选择知识点

We can text, whatsapp, Facebook message and snapchat — but are we losing the luxury (奢侈) of the phone conversation? Who has time to chat when you can spend hours on WhatsApp?

Most of my phone calls are less than a minute long. If I accidentally hit answer instead of pressing the ignore button, it’s usually to say, “Hold on, I’ll call you back” before quickly typing out a “whatsup?” text. My list of recent phone calls is limited to four people and unless we live together, are related, or dating, there is very little chance of joining that list.

But as the original mobile brand, Nokia, finally dies, it seems I’m not the only who’s abandoning the phone call. The average adult spends more time on media or communication per day (8 hours and 41 minutes) than on sleeping (8 hours and 21 minutes) but among all that communication, the phone call is the one medium that’s falling.

So why has the phone call fallen out of favor? The many messaging apps and emails seem to have created a gradient (坡度) of communication, so that the phone call is no longer the standard way of conversing long distance, but a relatively intimate (亲密的) thing.

Rachel, 24, says that she used to speak to all her girlfriends on the phone but now only calls a few. “I rarely even speak to good friends on the phone and if they call me, I’m like, ‘Hello, is something wrong?’,” says Rachel. “If I do a phone call, it feels really official, like it’s a big deal.”

Instead of taking the time to ring a friend and catch up, it now seems easier to send a brief message. And unless you’re extremely close to someone, an unscheduled phone call can feel like an intrusion (干扰). Whereas (但是) text messages can be put to one side for hours or even days, a phone call demands attention in the moment.

But while text messages and emails may be a more efficient way of sharing basic facts and information, they’re not necessarily the best way of communication. We may be communicating more than ever before, but we seem to be listening far less.

A

       A young woman carrying a three-year-old child got on a bus. The conductor hurried to give her a warm welcome and then kindly asked the other passengers to make more room for the woman and her child. On seeing this, people began to talk. "You know this conductor used to be very rude. Now suddenly he has changed his bad behavior , "said a middle-aged man.

       "Yes, he should be praised and we must write a letter to the company," said a second passenger. "Thatˈs right," another lady said, "I wish a newspaper reporter were here so that more people could learn from this conductor. "

        Just then a gentleman who looked like a teacher turned to the conductor and said , "Excuse me, but can I know your name, please? Your excellent service must be praised..."

       Before he could open his mouth, the three-year-old child sitting on the young womanˈs lap interrupted, "I know his name. I call him Dad."

B

       If you want to go shopping, you’d better decide how much money you can spend on new clothes. Think about the kind of clothes you really need. Then look for those clothes you really need. Then look for those clothes on sale.

      There are labels (标签) inside all new clothes. The labels tell you how to take care of your clothes. The label on a shirt may tell you to wash it in warm water. A label on a sweater may tell you to wash in cold water. The label on a coat may say “dry clean only”, for water-washing may destroy (毁坏) this coat. If you do according to the directions (说明书) on the label, you can keep your clothes looking their best for a long time.

       Many clothes must be dry cleaned. Dry cleaning is expensive. When buying new clothes, check to see if they will need to be dry cleaned. You will save money if you buy clothes that can be water-washed.

        You can save money if you buy clothes that are well done. Well-made clothes last longer. They look good even after they have been washed many times. Clothes that cost more money are not necessarily better made. They do not always fit better. Sometimes less expensive clothes look and fit better than more expensive clothes.

D

     It doesn’t matter when and how much a person sleeps , but everyone needs some rest to stay alive. That’s what all doctors thought , until they heard about Herpin. Herpin, it was said , never slept. Could this be true? The doctors decided to see this strange man themselves.

    Herpin was 90 years old when the doctors came to his home in New Jersey. They thought for sure that he got some sleep of some kind. So they stayed with him and watched every movement he made. But they were surprised . Though they watched him hour after hour and day after day, they never saw him sleeping. In fact , he did not even own a bed. He never needed one.

    The only rest that Herpin sometimes got was sitting in a comfortable chair and reading newspapers. The doctors were puzzled by this strange continuous sleeplessness. They asked him many questions, hoping to find an answer. They found only one answer that might explain his condition. Herpin remembered some talk about his mother having been injured several days before he was born. But that was all. Was this the real reason? No one could be sure. Herpin died at the age of 94.

It is natural that young people are often uncomfortable when they are with their parents. They say that their parents don’t understand them. They often think that their parents are out of touch with modern ways, that they are too serious and too strict with their children, and they seldom give their children a free hand.

It is true that parents often find it difficult to win their children’s trust and they tend to forget how they themselves felt when young. For example, young people like to act on the spot without much thinking. It is one of their ways to show that they have grown up and they can face any difficult situation. Older people worry more easily. Most of them plan things ahead and do not like their plans to be upset by something unexpected. When you want your parents to let you do something, you will have better success if you ask before you really start doing it.

Young people often make their parents angry with their choice in clothes, in entertainment and in music．But they do not mean to cause any trouble: it is just that they feel cut off from the older people’s world, into which they have not yet been accepted. That’s why young people want to make a new culture of their own, and if their parents do not like their music or entertainment or clothes or their way of speech, this will make the young people extremely happy.

Sometimes you are so proud of yourself that you do not want your parents to say, “ Yes” to what you do. All you want is to be felt alone and do what you like. It is natural enough, after being a child for so many years, when you were completely under your parents’ control. If you plan to control your life, you’d better win your parents over and try to get them to understand you. If your parents see that you have a high sense of responsibility, they will certainly give you the right to do what you want to do.

Pierre is a 25-year-old penguin at the California Academy of Sciences. Due to his old age, he was going bald, which made him feel too clod to swim in the pool. Therefore, biologists at the academy had a wetsuit created for this penguin to help him get back in the swimming pool.

Unlike marine mammals, which have a layer of blubber to keep them warm, penguins depend on their waterproof feathers. Without them, Pierre was unwilling to jump into the swimming pool and ended up trembling on the side of the pool while his 19 peers played in the water.

“He was cold; he would shake,” said Pam Schaller, a senior biologist. Schaller first tried a heat lamp to keep Pierre warm. Then she got another idea: if wetsuits keep humans warm in the cold Pacific, why not make one for Pierre?

Schaller designed the suit, which covered Pierre's body and had small openings for his flippers.

“I would walk behind him and look at where there were any gaps, and cut and refit and cut and refit until it looked like it was extremely suitable,” she said.

 One concern was that the other penguins would reject Pierre in his new suit, but in fact, they accepted his new look. He swam freely and got along with others well, although he was the only penguin with a black stomach.

Schaller couldn't say for sure whether the wetsuit allowed Pierre to recover his fine feathers, but “certainly we were able to keep him comfortable during a period of time that would have been very difficult for him to stay comfortable”.

       Animal moms are great moms. You might be surprised at some of these moms.

Octopuses (章鱼)

       The mother octopus lays about 50,000 eggs. For about 300 days, she stays with the eggs, cleans them and protects them. She does not leave to feed. However, this animal mom dies as soon as the eggs are hatched (孵化).

Crocodiles

       A crocodile mother puts a lot of time and effort into raising her babies. She starts by building a nest (巢), which she guards for over two months! When the eggs are ready to hatch, the young crocs call out to their mother, who digs them out and helps them hatch. She then carries them in her mouth down to the water, where she will guard them for several more weeks or months until they learn to hunt on their own.

Bats

       Bats become moms by hanging head up in a cave, giving birth. Catching the youngster before it can fall to the ground below, she puts it in a pouch (育儿袋). Bat moms may carry babies with them when feeding for the first few days. As the little bats get bigger and heavier, moms help them hang on the wall of their caves and return often to feed them. It continues for about three weeks, until the babies are grown up and able to fly on their own.

Koalas (考拉)

       The animal mom gives birth after a pregnancy (怀孕期) of only 35 days. The hairless baby climbs into its mother’s pouch and lives there for another five months. When the little koala is between five and eight months old, it leaves the pouch for short periods of time but returns for safety. Once it is too big to return to the pouch, it will climb onto its mother’s back and ride there until it is about 12 months old.

   In my eyes, the most basic and powerful way to communicate with another person is to listen. Just listen. Perhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention. And especially if it's given from the heart. When people are talking，there's no need to do anything but receive them. Listen to what they're saying. Care about it. Most times caring about it is even more important than understanding it. Most of us don't value ourselves or our love enough to know this. It has taken me a long time to believe in the power of simple saying “I'm so sorry.” when someone is in pain.

   One of my patients told me that when she tried to tell her story people often interrupted to tell her that they once had something just like that happening to them. Her pain became a story about themselves. Eventually she stopped talking to most people. We connect through listening. When we interrupt what someone is saying to let them know that we understand，we move the focus of attention to ourselves. When we listen，they know we care.

    I have even learned to respond to someone crying by just listening. In the old days I used to reach for the handkerchiefs，until I realized that passing a person a handkerchief  may be just another way to shut him down，to take them out of their experience of sadness. Now I just listen. When they have cried all they need to cry，they find me there with them.

    This simple thing has not been that easy to learn. It certainly went against everything I had been taught since I was very young. I thought people listened only because they were too shy to speak or did not know the answer. But now I know that a loving silence often has far more power to heal than the kindest words.